Love in a Headscarf

"At the age of thirteen, I knew that I was destined to marry John Travolta. One day he would arrive on my North London doorstep, fall madly in love with me and ask me to marry him. Then he would convert to Islam and become a devoted Muslim."

When I read the hilarious excerpt above, I knew that I had to buy the book. After a long search, I finally bought it at Kinokuniya KLCC on New Year's Day. It was my first purchase for 2012!

Though the book's main narration is about the author's journey to finding Mr. Right, there are also vignettes on what it means and how it feels to be a modern Muslim woman.

For example, Muslims are told to look beyond physical attributes and 'chemistry' when assessing potential life partners. We are told to give more emphasis on that person's religious commitment.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said in a famous hadeeth: Women may be married for four things: their wealth, their lineage, their beauty and their faith (religious commitment). Choose the one who is religiously-committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e. may you prosper).

But of course, knowing something doesn't necessarily mean we practise it. Thus we find people nowadays over-emphasising beauty and wealth while neglecting the most important component of all.

The author also shares her experiences after the September 11 and July 7 tragedies. Her headscarf singled her out from the crowd and inadvertently labeled her a terrorist. She recounted how that date marked "the very first time that [she] felt subhuman in Britain, and the first day [she] felt scared to live in [her] own country".

The headscarf plays a major role in the book. Not only is it featured in the title, it has a whole chapter dedicated to it. The author answers frequently-asked questions about her headscarf (the most popular being: "What's it like under there?") with a healthy dose of humour. Her eloquent answers also reject claims that the headscarf is oppressing Muslim women.

I also love stories about Khadijah, Safura, Aasiya, Maryam and Hagar inserted in intervals throughout the book. We should draw inspiration from their remarkable life-stories on how to be strong, brave and independent.

The book ends with the author finally finding 'the one'. After many misadventures and disappointments, the right guy finally shows up. And he was worth the wait, she professes. She counsels those still looking to be patient and to find Allah first, to love Allah and to trust Him.

"Perhaps he wasn't ready for us yet and still needed life to polish him up. Or maybe it was us that life needed to polish before we were ready for the one".

Twins of Faith Malaysia 2011

What are the twins of Faith? If you look at the above logo carefully, they are 'ilm and 'amal (knowledge & action). Interestingly, to further underscore their strong correlation to one another, both words are formed from the same 3 letters; lam, 'ain and mim. Throughout the whole 2-day conference, the importance of both was reiterated, again and again. You simply cannot act without knowledge and what is the use of knowledge if we don't put it into practice?

Though the concept is simple enough, not many of us do seek knowledge, do we? I mean, we were born Muslims so we think we have all religious rituals down pat. We probably do but that's exactly the problem; we view them as rituals - elements so intertwined with our culture that we think they are what Islam is all about: praying, fasting, Eid and the Hadj. We don't go out of our way to learn more about our beautiful religion. Islam has become a set of rituals instead of a way of life.

Alhamdulillah, I was very fortunate to be able to attend the Twins of Faith Family Festival in Putrajaya last weekend (Dec 24 & 25, 2011). The event was packed with talks, workshops and performances from 10am until 10pm on both days.

Below are some of the input that made an impact on me:

1) Sheikh Alaa Elsayed quoted a line from Lion King when he reminded us to "remember who [we] are". We are the best of nations as mentioned in the Quran:

You are the best of peoples ever raised up for mankind; you enjoin Al-Ma'ruf and forbid Al-Munkar, and you believe in Allah (Surah Al-'Imran, Verse 110).

Another speaker, Sheikh Tawfique Chowdhury, expounded on this point when he chastised Muslims who think so lowly of themselves:
"Why the defeatist attitude?" he had asked.
"How dare you think so small"
"How dare you think that Allah will not help you".

2) In the women-empowerment workshop by Dr. Harlina Halizah Siraj, maternal health care was discussed. It was sad to learn that countries like Afghanistan, Niger, Yemen, Mali and Sudan (which are predominantly Muslim countries) are considered the worst places to be a mother. Why is this so? Well, according to Save The Children report it all boils down to poverty and the (lack of) quality of life:

"...in Afghanistan, a typical woman has fewer than five years of education and will not live to be 45. Less than 16 percent of women are using modern contraception, and 1 child in 5 dies before reaching age 5. At this rate, every mother in Afghanistan is likely to suffer the loss of a child."

Referring to the "You are the best of peoples..." verse above, how can this be happening? Obviously we haven't been enjoining Al-Ma'ruf and forbidding Al-Munkar, and we've turned our backs to Allah. It is often said that the beauty of Islam is being covered by ugly Muslims and I think the report is a clear example of that.

3) One of the speakers shared a very interesting finding from a research: apparently, we are the amalgamation of the 5 people whom we are closest to. We commonly hear that our friends are our mirrors. This finding seems to corroborate that. It made me think of the 5 people closest to me and in what ways are they influencing my life?

We should all take stock of the company we are keeping and make necessary adjustments for we wouldn't want to be influenced negatively. One of the criteria of a good friend is: when you see them, you will think of Allah (SWT). So let's surround ourselves with such friends (and become one ourselves).

4) The session that left the biggest impact on me has got to be the fund-raising. Mercy Mission Malaysia is raising funds to build a KL Madinah. In the sirah, the Muhajirin (people who were persecuted in Makkah) sought refuge in Madinah. The people of Madinah, called the Ansar, willingly took in the Muhajirin and treated them compassionately.

Similarly, KL Madinah aims to provide shelter to those most in need such as new Muslims who may have had to leave their families, homes and possessions when they embraced Islam. A question was posed by such a revert in a video: "Where are our Ansars? Who will help us?"

It was head-spinning to witness people pledging RM100K, 50K, 25K, 10K and 5K without hesitation. Subhanallah, these are the people who are not attached to their wealth; who (figuratively) have the world their in hands but Allah in their hearts.

(It was announced that approximately RM1.9 million was raised in total! Allahu Akbar!)

5) The entertainment slots were equally thought-provoking as the talks. In fact, they were called 'Halal edutainment' to convey their intention to educate as well as entertain. My favourite performer was Boonaa Mohammed, followed closely by Muslim Belal. Both of them are spoken-word artists and their slam-poetry lyrics provide much food for thought.



Overall, it was a very well-organised event. There was a minor problem with crowd-control on the first day, but it was sorted out and the second day went much smoother. PICC was the perfect venue: the plenary hall was spacious and beautiful, the washrooms clean, and the view is just unparalleled. I liked the fact that the opening and closing ceremonies were kept short. No interminable VIP speeches that are synonymous with events in Malaysia. Most of all, I love the atmosphere exuded. It truly was a family festival. It was heartwarming to see whole families coming together to seek knowledge and to see the youth forming the majority of the crowd.

I'm thankful to Allah that I was able to attend the festival with beloved friends. Friends who came all the way from other states to gain something beneficial. In the end I believe all of us gained so much more than what we had set out to do.

Can't wait for Twins of Faith 2012! :)

Activists

I saw 2 documentaries recently which woke me up from my slactivism stupor.

The Cove



The Cove tells of an elite group of filmmakers, freedivers and activists that went on a secret mission to expose the dolphin slaughter in Taijin, Japan.

In the documentary, an interviewee from Greenpeace said (quoting from Margaret Mead); "Never depend on institutions or government to solve any problem. All social movements are founded by, guided by, motivated by and seen through by the passion of individuals."

However, it must be stressed that, passion should always be followed by actions. Ric O'Barry, the central figure in The Cove, drove the point home when he said; "You're either an activist or an inactivist, and I wanted to be active."

Gaza We Are Coming



Prior to the infamous Gaza Freedom Flotilla mission in 2010 (in which 9 Turkish activists were killed on board Mavi Marmara), there was an earlier attempt to break the Israeli naval siege on Gaza. 44 human-rights activists from 17 countries all over the world boarded 2 boats and successfully reached the Gaza shore on 23 August 2008.

Like the team from The Cove, these disparate individuals, united by a common cause, came together to successfully pull-off a highly-dangerous mission.

Watching these 2 documentaries was akin to watching espionage films. Indeed, one reviewer described The Cove as "The Bourne Identity meets Flipper". These amazing individuals overcame great odds and obstacles to achieve their objectives.

What made them stick out their necks like that?

According to one activist, it was because; "Every time I shave in the mirror, I look at myself and think I have done very little. I haven't done anything and that's the truth. And I think we should all do more."

I think that while it is good that we sign online petitions, 'like' certain pages, update our statuses and share articles to spread the awareness on various issues, it's high time we go beyond these measures and start to put in concrete actions.

Start small and see how it goes from there :)

May Allah give us the strength to make meaningful contributions...

The Search For Happiness

I recently read this adorable book, 'Hector and the Search for Happiness'. It tells of a psychiatrist (Hector), who became dissatisfied and developed doubts of his own after treating too many patients with no real disorders and no apparent misfortune. Why are these people unhappy then?

According to studies, you chances of being happy are greatly increased if: "you compared yourself to others and didn't find yourself wanting, if you had no money or health problems, if you had friends, a close-knit family, a job you liked, if you were religious and practised your religion, if you felt useful, if you went for a little stroll from time to time, and all of this in a country that was run by not very bad people".

Hector's patients are better-off than most people in this world. They are well-educated, came from good families, have well-paying jobs and live in a prosperous country. By right, they should be very happy. So why aren't they?

Hector, is his travels, learned that "Happiness is a certain way of seeing things". Some people are just better at being happy, just as some people are prone to wallowing in sadness.

All these made me think about how we as Muslims cope with sadness. Nobody is immune from troubles, big or small. And everybody is sad from time to time. So how does Islam teach us how to cope? What can we do to soothe our hearts and stay sane during calamities?

I think there are countless verses from the Quran, hadiths, and du'a which help (the Quran is after all described as "a healing and a mercy").

When Hector discovered that, "Happiness is a certain way of seeing things", I recalled this particular hadith: "Wondrous are the believer's affairs. For him there is good in all his affairs, and this is so only for the believer. When something pleasing happens to him, he is grateful, and that is good for him; and when something displeasing happens to him, he is patient, and that is good for him." (Reported by Muslim)

This Sabar (being patient) and Syukur (being grateful) are potent prescriptions indeed.

Another thing worth pointing out is the word 'happiness' itself. For me, happiness connotes something that is fleeting; something pleasurable that isn't meant to last. That is why I think Muslims are conditioned to pursue CONTENTMENT and PEACE instead.

I remember a phrase from the book 'The Translator', in which the protagonist described "feeling something deeper than happiness" when she was praying in her university mosque.

So, let's share our favourite Quranic verses/hadith/du'a that we regularly refer to to tide us over a bad patch (I know a friend whose favourite verses are these). May they be of benefit to others...

Flying Fox at Berjaya Hills

My sister and I came to try the canopy walk after reading the advertisement below.

But we ended up trying the 900-metre flying fox instead (touted to be the longest in South East Asia). It was such an exhilarating ride! I don't consider myself an adrenaline junkie; riding roller-coasters or other extreme rides are just not my thing. But surprisingly, I enjoyed every minute of this activity. The scariest part was alighting from the platform and feel yourself dangling precariously on the cable... but once you started gliding amidst the rainforest, it was so much fun!

Half of the adventure was getting to the points of departure. First, we had to put on the necessary gears (full body harness, carabiners, pulley, etc) before climbing the stairs of this tall structure. We had to go one by one as the structure cannot hold many people at one go. When I reached the top, a strong wind blew and I could feel the building swaying. I thought to myself, "What have I gotten myself into?"

After the short canopy walk, we did a little bit of hiking to reach the tree which will be our first point of departure. The hiking trek was a bit slippery, so wearing my Crocs flats wasn't such a good idea after all. Climbing the tree was most challenging as the holds were quite far apart. I felt a huge sense of achievement when I reached the top.

The 900-metre glide took only around 40 seconds or thereabouts. When I reached the other end, the guide asked, "Seronok tak?". I was grinning from ear to ear and replied in the affirmative. I was so eager for the next glide. A short canopy walk away, we had to climb a swaying ladder to reach the second point of departure. The guide told us the ladder was BUILT to sway. An apparatus for character building exercise, I suppose.

Ascending the ladder was not as scary as it looked. It just required a lot of patience as we need to hook and unhook our two carabiners all the way to the top. The view from the platform is amazing. This time round, my sister and I were let off simultaneously as there are 2 parallel cables, spanning 400 metres. We ended up at the Adventure Park Centre, where we had started our journey.

The whole thing took 1 hour to complete and was worth every penny :)

Sadly, we didn't take any pictures as carrying the DSLR when hiking and gliding would have been too cumbersome. A compact camera would have done the trick but we didn't bring ours.

Afterwards, we ate a really good pizza at La Flamme and roamed the Colmar Tropicale Square to take some pictures.

It was a very enjoyable day trip. Since it's only 1 hour from KL, I wouldn't mind going again.

Parit Penghulu Homestay Programme

When the programme was first promoted to the students, a colleague of mine overheard someone remark; "Home stay?? Lebih baik aku stay at home" (!)

But passing up the opportunity was his/her lost as the programme turned out to be immensely enjoyable. Twenty-eight Form 3 students of SMK Taman Melawati took part in the 2D1N programme held at the Parit Penghulu Homestay (also known as Kem Modal Insan) from 2 Nov to 3 Nov 2011.

Homestay usually denotes staying at the home of a foster family, but our group opted to stay in dormitories so that we can easily assemble for the planned activities.

In chronological order, we visited a Gula Melaka factory, painted Batik, played traditional games, roamed the paddy fields, rode a pick-up truck, went on the Melaka River Cruise, participated in Explorace, and stopped by the Hang Tuah Well.

All the activities were enjoyable but my favourites had to be roaming the paddy fields and cruising down the Melaka River. I never knew that gazing at the lush fields can be so therapeutic...

The students enjoyed themselves too. I overheard one of them say; "Rugi (insert name here) tak pergi". Her friends nodded in agreement. They all seemed reluctant to leave the place.

We felt deeply indebted to our host, Pak Man and his family. They were the embodiment of warm hospitality. We were comfortable and felt welcomed throughout our stay there.

For someone who was born and bred in KL, the village-life stint was utterly refreshing and memorable :)

Pictures from the programme can be viewed here and here.

Singapore Trip

What do you make of a vacation that's beset by one misadventure after another?

On 27-10-2011, we reached LCCT at 6.45am when our flight was due for take off at 7.25am. Once Papa dropped us off, it was a mad scramble to get to the boarding area before the gate closes. We had (mobile) checked-in earlier but hadn't factored in the time it would take to clear security check. We did manage to get on the flight but it was a very close shave!

Then, it rained heavily for 2 consecutive days when we were in Singapore.

Further, Irfan was not feeling well so he cut a forlorn figure on our first day there even though we were visiting his favourite place; the zoo!

Lastly, our flight back to KL was delayed for 1 hour 45 minutes. We touched down at 12.30am and reached home, completely exhausted at 2am.

Despite all these, the trip was highly enjoyable as it was spent with family members. It's cliched but true: It's the company that matters!

Singapore Zoo

The award-winning park was our first destination. The zoo truly deserves all the accolades heaped on it as it is very well-maintained and offers a myriad of attractions. Besides the animals in well-designed enclosures, other attractions include tram & boat rides, animal shows and feeding sessions.

I was also impressed with the services offered; parents with small kids can rent strollers or wagons while wheelchairs and scooters are available for those who are not up to covering the huge park on foot.

The customer service is also top-notch. We were on the boat ride when it rained. A staff was already waiting with umbrellas at the jetty to make sure we didn't get drenched before reaching the nearest shelter.

Universal Studios Singapore (USS)

We drove to Vivo City and then took the cable car to Sentosa Island. This is not the most economical way as a single trip will cost you SGD24! But we disregarded the steep price to experience the ride because it looked oh-so-inviting from below.

I don't think it was worth it though as our very own Genting Highlands cable cars provide a more enjoyable and scenic journey.

However, I have to admit that witnessing the world's busiest port from above - with its thousands of containers and hundreds of cranes - was awe-inspiring.

When we alighted at Imbiah Station, we had to walk further to reach USS (taking the Sentosa Express Tram would have been more convenient). Along the way, we passed by a few of Sentosa Island's many other attractions. According to the island's map, Sentosa has 31 attractions in all! USS seems to be the most popular but there are many other interesting offerings such as: Skyline Luge, The Merlion, Butterfly Park, Sky Tower and Underwater World.

Wow. This island is a veritable cash cow!

Finally, we reached USS at 11.30am. My 3 favourite rides were: Shrek 4-D Adventure, Enchanted Airways and Revenge of the Mummy. I was too scared to try the Battlestar Galactica roller coasters, USS's most extreme rides.

Even though we went on a Friday, the place was brimming with people. This translated into long queues that could take up to 50 minutes! I didn't have the patience nor the stamina to wait that long so I forwent a few of the attractions. Some visitors circumvented the problem by purchasing the Universal Express Pass which enables them to have priority access to all the rides.

So do avoid the weekends and public holidays for a more enjoyable visit. Another tip would be to download the Resort World Sentosa app which will keep you updated with the waiting times of all the attractions so that you can plan your route optimally.

Day 3

We explored the city using the MRT on our last day there. We took a train from Woodlands to Marina Bay. The Marina Bay Sands looks spectacular. So do the ArtScience Museum, Singapore Flyer and The Helix Bridge.

On our way back, on the MRT, I noticed how clean and green the city is. How well-planned and systematic. It's also refreshing to see signboards and trees unsullied by illegal advertisements. Moreover, the roads are pot-hole free, a far cry from KL roads' crater-like surface.

Confronted with our neighbour's modernity, affluence and efficiency, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy. Why are we not more like them?

Coincidentally, I read this in The Star when I got back home: AirAsia X Slams Malaysia Airports.

AirAsia X's CEO Azran Osman-Rani lambasted Malaysia Airports Holdings Berhad (MAHB) for the delayed construction of KLIA2 and the subsequent public funds cost overruns.

He said, had the Government allowed AirAsia/Sime Darby to build the new low-cost carrier terminal at Labu, it would have been ready by now and no public funds would have been used.

His tweeted; "We keep taking two steps forward, and get dragged two steps backward. Macam mana nak maju?"

Macam mana indeed...

Kids & Exams

My friend Wanee, posted this as her status: "neglecting the answer scripts that r shouting to be marked... no no... not hearing them! lalala (looks the other way...)"

Although, like Wanee, I generally detest marking, I do derive some pleasure when I come across scripts such as these (they provide the much needed comic relief):

Angsa? It baffles me when a 16-year-old cannot spell Ansar correctly. *sigh*

Where the streets had a name

I was browsing the general fiction section at the Big Bad Wolf Sale when I saw the book. I gave a small gasp. What a serendipitous find!

I've read the 2 earlier books by Randa Abdel-Fattah (Does My Head Look Big In This? & Ten Things I Hate About Me) and have been looking for this one.

Though her books are targeted to young adults, I enjoyed reading them nonetheless. Her stories are always funny and enjoyable to read. Yet, at the same time, they deal with serious issues such as coming to grips with your identity and being a proud Muslim in a discouraging/hostile environment.

Her latest book attempts to tackle an even bigger issue: the plight of the Palestinians.

I love the novel! Hayaat, the 13-year-old heroine is a spunky character that you'll come to love and admire.

When her beloved grandmother, Sitti Zeynab, collapsed and was taken away in an ambulance, Hayaat knew that she had to do something. So, she came up with the idea to bring back a handful of soil from her grandmother's ancestral home in Jerusalem.

Hayaat enlisted the help of her best friend, Samy, to help her negotiate the various obstacles she needed to overcome to enter Jerusalem (the separation wall, the checkpoints, the curfews, the permit system, etc).

Even though their journey is only a few kilometres long and should not have taken more than 20 minutes by car, due to the obstacles mentioned above, it took hours and was fraught with danger.

Besides having a strong protagonist, the novel also offers memorable supporting characters. Samy, who "infuriates adults even without saying a word", is a standout. The others; Sitti Zeynab, Mama, Baba and Jihan (Hayaat's older sister) also contribute significantly to the novel.

I like how Randa Abdel-Fattah  interspersed the profound message of her novel with funny dialogues such as this between Hayaat and Samy:

"What if we die?"
"Eh?"
"What if we get shot?"
"I probably won't. I have my cross for protection. I can lend you one if you like. But you're a Muslim, so it might not work".

They are cute, aren't they? Do read the book if you can.

TAXI

Taken from the blurb:
TAXI brings together 58 fictional dialogues with Cairo cabbies recreated from the author's own experience of traversing the city. It takes the reader on a roller-coaster of emotions as bumpy and noisy as the city's potholed and chaotic streets.
Described as an urban sociology, an ethnography, a classic oral history - and a work of poetry in motion - TAXI tells Herculean tales of the struggle for survival and dignity among Cairo's 80,000 cab drivers. It is a wing-mirror that reflects both on modern Egypt and the human condition, plucking from the rush-hour sandstorm a feast of memories, lies, loves, hates and dreams.
TAXI was an instant bestseller in Arabic markets and has been credited with reviving an interest in reading in Egypt. This unique work explores the poignant self-reflections of members of a caste who have little in common apart from their trade.

It took me a while to really be engaged in Taxi. The 58 stories span only 245 pages. So, on average, one story is only 4 pages long. I feel that that's too short because by the time you're invested in the story, the chapter ends. You ended up feeling/wondering "That's it?!". Further, there were also some jokes, expressions and references peculiar to Egypt that I didn't get.

But I became engrossed when reading about the various misfortunes plaguing Egypt. Ordinary Egpytians struggle on a daily basis due to the rising cost of food and other commodities. Milk is considered a luxury, consumed only by the rich. A horrifying statistic disclosed that 10% of the children in Southern Egypt are mentally-retarded from malnutrition.

The hopelessness of the situation is underlined when a taxi driver lamented, "...it's impossible for anyone in Egypt to make do with his salary. Because how much are salaries? From 300 to 600 pounds and no more than that. And that's not enough. So what's the answer? Either we steal or take bribes or work all day.".

Besides stagnant wages and rising cost of living, Egyptians also grapple with:
-an ineffective a broken bureaucracy
-widespread corruption and bribery
-manufactured news broadcasted by state-owned medias
 -the dismal state of education in public schools
-the mistreatment of minorities in the society
-polluted air in the city

Reading the stories from these taxi drivers will make you understand why Egyptians revolted against their government and how the Arab Spring came to be.

Their frustration is palpable when you read remarks like this: "Frankly, the government does everything it can to turn us into beggars or criminals. You feel they're making a big effort to ruin us and our families..."

Though we Malaysians are much better off, we shouldn't feel too smug. Yes, we should be grateful that our situation is not that dire but we shouldn't feel too complacent. The list of problems stated above sounds familiar, doesn't it?

Do grab the book (published by ZI Publications) and read it as "a man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world" (George Santayana).